Working from home has many benefits for employees. It is convenient for workers in several ways. In addition, it brings a number of advantages to them.3文で26語使っているが、言っているのは「在宅勤務には利点がある」の一言だけ
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Working from home allows employees to avoid long commutes, which gives them more time for rest and family responsibilities.1文19語で、利点の中身とその結果まで進んでいる
The main reason for supporting remote work is that it gives employees more control over their daily schedules. Workers who are not tied to a fixed office routine can arrange their tasks around the hours in which they concentrate best. This flexibility also removes the daily commute, which in many large cities takes up more than two hours of personal time. A parent working for a company in Tokyo, for example, can start earlier in the morning and still collect a child from school. Employees who manage their own time in this way are likely to remain more productive throughout the week.
導入(43語) It is often argued that employees should be allowed to work from home rather than travel to an office every day. I strongly agree with this view, because remote work gives people more control over their time and reduces pressure on urban transport.
結論(35語) In conclusion, employees should be allowed to work from home, because this arrangement gives workers greater control over their daily schedules and reduces the pressure that commuting places on public transport networks in large cities.
ブロックごとの配分と同じくらい効くのが、一文の長さです。一般的な英文ライティングでは、1文25〜30語程度が読みやすさの目安とされていて、『英語ライティングの鬼100則』(明日香出版社)の Must 39 でもこの幅が挙げられています。タスク2では、上限側の30語ではなく25語のほうを意識しておくと、40分という条件の中でも構造を保ちやすくなります。トピックセンテンスは簡潔に、それ以外の文は概ね25語以下。これがこの記事で置く目安です。
Another important reason why I believe that governments should invest more money in public transport systems is that this kind of investment can reduce the number of cars on the road.31語。前置きが長く、論点の中心が文の後半まで出てこない
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Investment in public transport also reduces the number of cars on city roads.13語。主張だけを残し、理由づけは次の文に回している
Although many people believe that university education should be free for all students because it increases equality of opportunity, governments have limited budgets and therefore they need to decide carefully which areas of public spending should be prioritised.38語。譲歩、理由、逆接が1文に同居していて、どこが主張なのか読み取りにくい
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Many people argue that university education should be free because it widens access to higher learning. However, governments work with limited budgets and must decide which areas of public spending come first.16語と16語の2文。合計32語で、1文目が他者の主張、2文目が反論という役割に分かれている
短く割ることは、文の幅を狭めることとは違います。Grammatical Range and Accuracy で見られているのは、さまざまな文構造を使い分けられるかと、それを正確に書けるかです。1文に構造を詰め込むこと自体が評価されるわけではありません。従属節を1つ含む20語前後の文を正確に書けるほうが、40語の文で構造を崩すより評価されます。